General considerations on how children choose their parents before reincarnation

When a woman has a child, there is much more there than a new life or a child. Children are for Spiritism like an empty vessel, in it they are filled with experiences, emotions and the daily experiences. They are considered companion spirits who are placed in our lives to strengthen us and help in our evolution.

Therefore, the purpose of this relationship is to mutually help the spirits of parents and children to share their earthly experiences in order to achieve soul evolution.

Thus, the whole process of living among the spirits of a family is of mutual growth and learning. Just as children learn from their parents, parents will also learn from their children. Understand how this combination of souls happens before the children's reincarnation in the following text.

Reincarnation, spirits incarnating in the same family and planning

In short, it is understood that the spiritual plane works with commitment, discipline, and wisdom. Free will orders and sets all our wills right, nothing should be done by chance. Therefore, it is important to be aware of the consequences of our choices. Understand how reincarnation works in the spiritual world below.

How reincarnation works in the spirit world

At the moment of reincarnation there are the guides who will decide who will be your future parents on Earth. Meanwhile, the reincarnant must be prepared to receive the new body.

If all the people who are taking part of this process are connected by past life bonds, they will give continuity to your experiences inherited by your past experiences. That is, if you have ties of affection, for example, the connection between souls will facilitate your birth and experience here on Earth.

However, if there is any kind of misunderstanding or negative emotions like hurt and rancor as inheritance from previous reincarnations, you will need to go through several meetings with these spirits to soften and even overcome these feelings corrosive to the soul.

Therefore, reincarnation in the spiritual world would work as an evolutionary process in order to relieve the tension points existing in your soul, either overcoming challenges or helping other spirits, because all who come to Earth come here with a purpose.

Who are the spirits who incarnate in the same family

Spirits incarnated in the same family are usually close relatives or sympathetic spirits. Most likely you have had several experiences in past lives with each family member and this affinity has brought you together in this incarnation.

Who are the spirits who do not incarnate in the same family

It may happen that these incarnate spirits are born into a different family. In this sense, you will have to fulfill a higher purpose in life. Very possibly, you will go through a process of mutual acquaintance, in which each one will help the other in their measure.

Reconciliation meetings on the Spiritual Plane

The reconciliation meeting is a remarkable event of the spiritual plane. Through the monitors of the reincarnation process, meetings are held with their future parents. They come in spirit after falling asleep on the earth plane, at that time the meetings are held.

All reconciliation is done to ensure a better efficiency in the evolution process of the souls. The future parents already live on Earth and are guided by the spiritual guides in order to strengthen the union of their parents and generate a child. These meetings occur in an unconscious way, because upon awakening, these memories are forgotten.

Soon a series of events will occur in your parents' lives that will culminate in your birth. The souls gathered there will constitute your family and organize a whole series of events so that you can be reincarnated.

Reincarnation planning

Everything must be carefully planned. Therefore, reincarnation planning happens in advance. While your parents grow up and unite, you will already be preparing yourself in the spiritual plane for the moment of reincarnation. First, you must plan the birth of your parents in order to plan those of your children.

When the long-awaited day arrives to reincarnate on Earth, a series of rituals follow, such as the farewell to the spiritual plane. In it, you will meet all the spirits you had a relationship with in that environment, besides making a commitment with your spiritual guides so that everything happens in the best possible way during your stay on Earth.

The day of reincarnation

The definitive day of Reincarnation will be the moment when the spirit will bind itself to its mother's womb. Your perispirit body must be replaced by a new body on the Earth plane. Soon, you will be guided by your guide until your reincarnation and you will be born on the Earth plane to begin a new cycle in your journey.

Family ties and the family group on the spiritual plane

Family bonds are extremely strong, but there is a family group even broader than blood, in which this bond is even more significant. In this section you will learn all about the family group in the spiritual plane and how the spiritual kinship works. Follow along!

The true family ties

For Spiritism, family ties are not defined by blood, but the true family ties are those united by spirits who have lived an evolutionary process together. Before, during and after their incarnation.

Our family group on the Spiritual Plane

On the spiritual plane we also have a family group, just as on Earth. Our family group on the spiritual plane goes far beyond family members, having many more affective ties that are linked to the spirit. It is preserved even after you have incarnated.

Just as on the earthly plane, your absence will generate longing in the disincarnated loved ones who have ties with you. But, everyone is aware that the separation is momentary and nothing will undo the bonds of love built by you.

Vision in the corporal and spiritual kinship in the Gospel according to Kardec

A new vision of corporal and spiritual kinship is described in Allan Kardec's spiritist gospel. Spirits may incarnate in the same family with close kinship, being associated to sympathetic spirits. Besides, there are also cases of reincarnations in distinct families, that is, they are unknown spirits.

In both cases, the meetings and reunions aim at learning and subjection to trials for the evolution. Remember that the true family ties are the spiritual ones, and not the blood ones. Thus, the maturing of all in the spiritual kinship is the objective of reincarnations.

Affinity as a bond from other incarnations

It is understood that relationships which arouse affinity are a reflection of bonds created in other reincarnations. Perhaps that friend of yours with whom you have an inexplicable affinity was a loving parent to you in a past life.

Or perhaps your sister with whom you are so intimate has already crossed paths with you in other lives and is now learning as your sister. It is also normal to feel this way with those with whom you have a family relationship on the spiritual plane.

Definition of parents, understanding of earthly life and connections to past lives

One of the topics that most interests those who begin to study spiritualism is about the choice of parents. After all, are our parents chosen randomly or is there a meaning behind this choice? Read on to find out!

How parents are defined before reincarnation

It is during the reincarnation planning that the families are chosen. So, there are basically two reasons that lead us to choose our parents in reincarnation. The first one is the affection and affinity, which may lead us to reincarnate again in the same family.

The other is the settling of accounts. Many times we need to solve a pendency with another spirit that may reincarnate as our parents or son, so that our spirit may evolve and solve these issues.

After all, the relationship between parents and children is extremely strong and complex, and this experience can help the spirits to evolve and even to put themselves in the role of the other, amplifying the experiences of past lives.

Are our children the same in every reincarnation?

No. Despite the immeasurable love that parents feel for their children, it is very probable that this bond will not be repeated in the next lives. This does not mean that the spirits that were parents and children in this life will not maintain an affinity, but that they need other experiences to be able to evolve.

Consider that the cycle of evolution needs to bring experiences and new perspectives, so we are always changing roles when reincarnating. In this way, our empathy will be amplified, as well as compassion for others. Only by putting ourselves in the other's shoes can we cultivate these feelings.

Understanding earthly life

The earthly life is one of several passages that we have to experience, however, our true home is the spiritual realm. It is common for many spirits to be years waiting in this realm in search of an opportunity to incarnate to settle their debts left by their past lives, always in search of evolution.

Thus, understand earthly life as a stage in the great spiritual school. In this moment you have the opportunity to learn and evolve, so do not waste it. Take advantage also to help others who cross your paths in their evolutions.

Because my children are my children, in the Spiritist vision

It is understood that children, in the spiritualist view, are intimately linked to their parents. Most of the times, this happens due to the formation of ties that happened in their past lives. This happens independently of consanguineous or adoptive ties.

These ties can be either positive and inspire affinity, or be the result of conflicts. In the second case, these reunions are caused to allow both spirits to mature. Thus, your children are reincarnated in this role so that you can settle accounts and evolve.

The connection in past lives

We cross with several spirits during reincarnations. Each one of them brings learning, happiness and sadness. However, some bonds are stronger than others and can be perpetuated even in the next lives.

In this way, connections are created through reincarnations, where reunions happen to favor certain learning. For example, if a mother has acted in a permissive way and her son has grown arrogant, in a next life she can come as an arrogant person, in order to learn the impacts of this behavior.

Or she may reincarnate as mother or father of a child full of guilt, where she will need to act to help this child, learning in the process. And this way the spirits go learning and evolving among themselves, each one bringing their baggage in search of the spiritual maturing.

Conflicts in past lives

Several conflicts may arise along life and, some of them are felt also in the next reincarnations. The conflicts between parents and children are especially more intense, due to the potency of this bond.

Thus, even the conflicts of the present life can be impacts of unsolved problems in past lives. In some cases children are rejected by their parents due to conflicting relations between these two spirits in previous lives. Then, it is up to these people to seek for maturation and spiritual evolution to break this cycle.

Cause of disproportionate love, according to Spiritism

Maternal love is not a natural instinct, as many think. It is, actually, a quality to be conquered through spiritual evolution. So, when a spirit reincarnates in the form of a father or a mother who truly loves their children, it is because even before the reincarnation he was aware of the commitment that was to come.

Thus, these spirits are ready to give themselves, to love instead of hating, to renounce selfish pleasures and make sacrifices for their children. However, it is observed that the unmeasured love can also bring negative impacts for both parties. It is necessary not to confuse maternal love with possession, which can hinder the evolution of parents and children.

The ingratitude of children, according to Spiritism

When it comes to the ingratitude of children, you must first deal with the fact that children are not their parents', but are free spirits who are during this life as their children. Also, keep in mind that every reincarnation is a learning process.

That means, both your children and you are going through several situations to be able to better understand your past mistakes and successes and proceed with the evolution. So, the ingratitude and rebelliousness of the children is, most of the times, a reflection of attitudes of their own parents in past lives.

You are, at this moment, having the opportunity to settle your mistakes. Develop the quality of forgiveness, fill yourself with love and seek to understand those who, in this life, are your children. Be grateful for the learning opportunity that this life is giving you and assume the need to evolve.

What is the greatest lesson of this bond between mother and child?

The biggest lesson of the mother's bond is that love should always come first. Don't let love be left aside and give way to hate, selfishness and other negative feelings.

Keep in mind that both you and your children are evolving spirits, and help each other in this process. Ask for protection from the celestial beings and pray that they guide this family journey so that everyone can reincarnate with positive baggage.

Are there children who choose their parents before reincarnating to resolve past issues?

Yes! Although the children do not reincarnate always in the same family, many times the role of father and mother is chosen for the children who need to solve pending issues from other lives.

The reincarnation planning aims the evolution and the settlement of accounts. So, know that no relation of this life is for nothing, all of them are essential for the learning and evolution.

Knowing this, seek to cultivate love in all your connections, whether they are family or not. Understand that everyone is going through the challenge of maturing spirit, so be empathetic and compassionate.